You’re Doing Just Fine, Girl

Who knew that hearing another woman groove to the sound of the word “nobody” over and over again would make us all feel so much better?

Written by Ariana Pleasure

Photo courtesy of Solange, Columbia Records, and Saint Records

Music feeds the soul with words of wisdom when we find ourselves navigating circumstances we don’t understand. As a 20-year-old woman, I have already learned a great deal of lessons, both good and bad.

But with every step, there was always an album or a song that stuck with me, reminding me I wasn’t alone. Now, when I look back, I connect those times with those songs, with how they taught me that, at the end of the day, it’s okay to not to be okay.

Listening to the voices of powerful women on a daily basis has always been the move. But getting to hear those special songs, filled with those women’s truths about their lowest points, creates a certain kind of connection and provides a great deal of encouragement. We often forget that –– at the end of the day –– the musicians we admire are just people trying to figure it all out like we are.

This is probably not the first time you’ve heard about Solange’s A Seat at the Table record, and it will definitely not be your last. A masterpiece in many ways, the album is soul warming and honest. Through her groovy beats and angelic voice, Solange tells us the tale of her own life. “Cranes in the Sky,” arguably one of her best songs, gives a lot of insight on who she is as a woman and shares a part of her most vulnerable self.

In the song, Solange describes all the ways she’s tried to escape her sorrows and worries. From dancing, to drinking, to changing her hair, she attempts to figure it all out — but ultimately fails. In the chorus, she sings, “Sometimes I don’t wanna feel those metal clouds,” a feeling most women can see themselves in. All women have their own versions of metal clouds hanging over and know the feelings of wanting to run away from them. As you listen, you start to realize the pain she’s going through, and in doing so, you feel a little bit less alone in your own pain.

Hayley Williams from Paramore has always had a strong way of sharing her feelings in lyrical form. We got to hear Williams’ honesty in Paramore’s more rockish albums from their earlier years, and we still hear it in their newest album, After Laughter. In fact, After Laughter confronts mental health straight on, drawing from Hayley’s own experiences. Don’t let the upbeat and high energy songs fool you — some of the major messages featured deal with being unsure with where you are in life at the moment.

Photo courtesy of Zac Farro and Fueled by Ramen

Just as the title implies, “Fake Happy” is a song about putting on a happy face even when you’re feeling far from it. In the beginning of the song, Williams sings, “I bet everybody here/ is just as insincere/ we’re all so fake happy.” As a result, Hayley communicates that she knows that she knows she’s not the only one faking happiness.

Lastly, “Nobody” off of Mitski’s recent album Be the Cowboy is an anthem for even the most overwhelming moments of feeling lonely and unwanted. Being alone isn’t always sad, but when those feelings hit you, they can really hit you. As Mitski repeatedly sings “nobody” to a beat that makes you want to dance your ass off (possibly while shedding a tear or two), you get to scream along with her in pure catharsis.

Photo courtesy of Spin

As Mitski continues to communicate her loneliness, you suddenly feel less alone in your own. Who knew that hearing another woman groove to the sound of the word “nobody” over and over again would make us all feel so much better? It sucks to feel unloved, but women like Mitski help us band together to cry it all out on the dance floor.

When you think about it, it’s pretty hard to imagine a woman who hasn’t bared her heart in one way or another to the world. After all, navigating our lives as femmes as we venture in and out of relationships, friendships, and our self love journeys can be quite the experience. Most of us aren't sure about anything and everything, and sometimes we feel a bit more blue.

But, it's songs and artists like these that encourage us to not only keep pushing through but to  always remember our feelings are valid. Here's to the great women in music that tell their truth so that we can feel better about ours.