The Feminine Musique: “She Will Be Loved”

First released in 2002, “She Will Be Loved” shows a few characteristics of the soon-to-be-named “nice guy” trope. However, in spite of these flaws, the song remains a positive song about a man supporting a girl –– in one way or another.

The Feminine Musique is a series where writers analyze portrayals of women in music.

Written by Haley Kennis

Photo courtesy of Interscope Records

“She Will Be Loved” established Maroon 5 as pop stars beyond alternative rock. While the first two singles from their debut album proved popular on alternative radio stations and charts, “She Will Be Loved” pushed the band towards a lighter, poppier sound where they have stayed to this day. The sweet, romantic sound of “She Will Be Loved” captured the hearts of many listeners in 2004 and beyond, but is the message of the song really as sweet as it initially sounds?

Beauty queen of only eighteen

She had some trouble with herself

He was always there to help her

She always belonged to someone else

I drove for miles and miles and wound up

At your door

I've had you so many times but somehow I want more

The gentle, romantic sound of “She Will Be Loved” is tainted with some unfortunate attitudes from the very first verse of the song. The line “he was always there to help her / she always belonged to someone else” sounds eerily similar to classic “nice guy” rhetoric. This isn’t a guy who actually cares, but “a guy who will be nice” to a girl “and expect some sort of romantic or sexual reward” from her, according to Urban Dictionary.

From the get-go, the song states that she belongs to another guy rather than actively choosing to be in a relationship with him. As a result, she is presented as an object for men to possess rather than as a person with autonomy. This verse ultimately portrays the titular girl of “She Will Be Loved” as a damsel-in-distress who needs the “white knight” narrator to sweep her off her feet. She is not an active agent in her own life, but a bystander who needs guidance from a man. The third verse of the song includes similarly troublesome attitudes towards relationships with women:

I know where you hide alone in your car

Know all of the things that make you who you are

I know that goodbye means nothing at all

Comes back and makes me catch her every time she

Falls

The line “know all of the things that make you who you are / know all of the things that make you who you are” continues to paint the girl as a lost, sad person that the guy apparently knows better than she knows herself. We never hear if she wants him to save her –– just that she needs him to save her over and over again. The choice of the words “comes back and makes me catch her every time she / falls” frames the guy as the reluctant hero instead of someone who is actively choosing to be a supportive part of her life. This verse further pushes the idea that this guy feels like he is entitled to her love just because he is a supportive friend. Her emotions are continuously assumed without question and her autonomy is repeatedly denied in both of these verses. The first and third verse of the song paint a bleak picture of the relationship between these two people, but the chorus takes a surprisingly positive turn.

I don't mind spendin' everyday

Out on your corner in the pourin' rain

Look for the girl with the broken smile

Ask her if she wants to stay awhile

And she will be loved, and she will be loved

Starting with the lyric “I don’t mind spendin’ everyday/ out on the corner in the pouring rain,” this chorus signals a big shift in the song’s tone. Instead of sounding like a guy complaining about being “stuck in the friend zone,” the singer says he doesn’t mind waiting to see if she shares the same feelings for him and will support her either way. Though there is still a bit of damsel-in-distress left in these lines, the fact that the narrator insinuates that he might not be the one for her counteracts the “nice guy” attitude. He doesn’t feel hurt; he doesn’t get angry –– he just accepts what is best for her. At the end of the day, he just wants to make sure “she will be loved,” regardless of who that is.

Tap on my window, knock on my door, I

Want to make you feel beautiful

I know I tend to get so insecure

It doesn't matter anymore

It's not always rainbows and butterflies

It's compromise that moves us along yeah

My heart is full, and my door's always open

You can come anytime you want yeah

The second verse of “She Will Be Loved” also attempts to make up for some of the bad attitudes earlier in the song, but still falls into a few of the same “nice guy” tropes. The girl is again given choice in this verse, especially in the lines “tap on my window, knock on my door / I want to make you feel beautiful” and “my heart is full, and my door’s always open / you can come anytime you want yeah.” Though these sentiments are much better than the first verses, the implication that she can’t make herself feel beautiful without him still carries a grimy, manipulative feeling. In this verse, she is given the basic agency to choose whether or not she wants to have his support, and once more, he doesn’t feel cheated by her ability to decide for herself.

As he continues, it becomes much more obvious that he truly does care about the woman. He sees her more as a partner than an attractive object, acknowledging that relationships “are not always rainbows and butterflies / it’s compromise that moves us along.” Though this is a far cry from his possessive wording in the first verse, compromise and care are basic requirements for a healthy relationship and don’t make him special. The chorus and second verse portray their relationship in a much more positive light, even if the shadow of entitlement still looms in the background. She isn’t an object, but a person he will always support if she needs it, romantically or not. He isn’t “stuck in the friend zone.” He loves her and is happy to be a part of her life wherever he fits in.

Overall, “She Will Be Loved” comes across as genuinely loving, heartfelt song that is a bit tainted with “nice guy” atitudes. Though two verses portray the woman as a victim that must be saved, the chorus and second verse give her back enough agency to make it seem like the narrator actually truly does love her as a person. He may feel entitled to her romance, but he doesn’t ever explicitly state that he thinks he deserves it. Though it has its problems, “She Will Be Loved” ultimately portrays the girl as enough of her own person,resulting in a much more positive view of the so-called “friend zone” than most songs.